மனித மனம் (குணம் )....

நான்கு ரவுடிகள் தீபாவை துரத்திக்கொண்டு ஓடிக்கொண்டிருந்தனர் ....எதேச்சையாக அந்த தெரு பக்கம் வந்த சுரேந்தர் பார்த்த மாத்திரத்திலேயே துரத்தப்படுவது தன்னுடன் வேலை பார்க்கும் தீபாதான் என்பதை தெளிந்து அந்த ரவுடி கும்பலை விரட்டிப்பிடித்து அடித்து துவைக்கையில் கேட்டது அலாரம் டைம் பீஸின் மணியொலி ...கலைந்தது கனவு....

அலாரத்தை ஆப் செய்ய முயன்றபோதுதான் கௌரி முனங்கினாள் ,"ஏங்க அலாரம் அடிக்கல போன் அடிக்குது ..ஏந்தான் இப்டி இருக்கீங்களோ "என்று அந்த உறக்கத்திலேயும் தெளிவாக கடிந்து விட்டு மீண்டும் உறங்கிவிட்டாள் ...

"அட ஆமா போன் அடிக்குது "
"ஹலோ....."
"டேய் சுரேந்தரு அப்பா பேசுறேன் டா "
"என்னப்பா இந்த நேரத்ல என்ன ஆச்சு ?"
"ஒண்ணுமில்ல ....அம்மாக்கு கொஞ்சம் ஒடம்பு சரியில்ல...நீ கொஞ்சம் வந்தா தேவலைன்னு தோனுச்சு ..இப்போவே சொன்னாதான நாளைக்காவது வரமுடியும் ...அதான் சொன்னேன்..."
"சரிப்பா வரேன் ...அம்மாவ அதுவர பத்தரமா பாத்துக்கோ"
"வரும்போது விச்சு குட்டியையும் ,கெளரியையும் கூட்டிட்டு வாடா..பாத்து ஒரு வருசம் ஆகுது "
"சரிப்பா "
"சரி அப்ப நான் போன வச்சிரட்டுமா ?"
"சரிப்பா ..அம்மாவ பாத்துக்கோ ...நீயும் ஒடம்ப பாத்துக்கோ ...போன வக்கிறேன் "

திரும்ப தூங்க முயன்றான் ...உறக்கம் வர வில்லை ....யோசனையாகவே இருந்தது...அவனுக்கும் அம்மாவையும் அப்பாவையும் பார்க்க வேண்டும் போல் இருந்தது ....இவனுக்கும் கெளரிக்கும் மாதம் ஒரு நாள் மட்டுமே விடுப்பு எடுத்துகொள்ள இயலும் ..மேலும் விடுப்பு வேண்டியிருப்பின் சம்பளத்தில் சிறு பகுதியை இழக்க நேரிடும் ..அதுவும் விச்சு பள்ளிக்கூடம் செல்ல ஆரம்பித்ததில் இருந்து ஊர்பக்கம் செல்வதே அரிதாகி விட்டது ...அம்மாவும் அப்பாவும் தங்களது புளியங்குடி சொந்த வீட்டை விட்டு வரமாட்டோம் என்பதில் உறுதியாக உள்ளனர்...அவர்கள் நினைப்பதில் ஒருவகை நியாயம் இருக்கத்தான் செய்கிறது ...பல ஆண்டுகள் பத்துக்கு பத்து அளவு வாடகை வீட்டில் குடியிருந்துகொண்டு ஆசை ஆசையாய் பார்த்து பார்த்து அவர்கள் கட்டிய வீடு அது...அதை விட்டு சென்னையில் சுரேந்தருடன் தங்க அவர்களுக்கு மனம் இல்லை...வீடு ஒரு புறம் காரணமாய் இருக்க கௌரியும் அவர்களின் தனிமை விருப்பத்திற்கு காரணமாய் அமைந்தாள்...
சிந்தனை ஓட்டத்தை நிறுத்திவிட்டு அந்நாளை தொடங்க ஆயத்தமானான் சுரேந்தர் ....


நேற்று இரவு பிரிஜில் வைத்த இட்லியையும் சாம்பாரையும் கடமை உணர்வுடன் விழுங்கிக்கொண்டு இருந்தான் ...

"என்னங்க காலைல போன் வந்துதே ...யாரு ?"
"நானே உன்கிட்ட சொல்ணும்னு இருந்தேன் ...அப்பா பேசினாரு "
"ஓஹோ ...என்ன சொன்னாங்க ?"
"அம்மாக்கு ஒடம்பு சரியில்லயாம் ...நம்மள வரச்சொன்னாரு "
"அவர் சொல்றது சரிதான் ...ஆனா திடுதிப்புன்னு லீவு எடுக்க முடியாது ..அதும் புது மேனேஜர் ஸ்ட்ரிக்ட் ...விச்சுக்கு ஹாப் இயர்லி லீவ் தான ..நீங்களும் அவனும் போயிட்டு வாங்க ..."
"விச்சு ஒன்ன விட்டுட்டு இருக்க மாட்டான் ..அவன என்னால தனியா சமாளிக்க முடியாது ".
"சரி வுடு .நான் மட்டும் போயிட்டு வரேன் ...சாந்தரம் ஆபிஸ்ல இருந்து வந்த உடனே சாப்புட்டு நைட் பஸ்ஸ புடிக்குறேன் "
"சரிங்க "
காலை பதினோரு மணி அளவில் கெளரிக்கு போன் வந்தது.கெளரியின் தாய்க்கு உடம்பு முடியவில்லை என்பதே தகவல்...

"ஹலோ நான் கௌரி பேசுறேங்க ..அப்பா போன் பண்ணாரு ...அம்மாக்கு ஒடம்பு முடியலையாம்...வரச்சொன்னாரு ...நானும் விச்சுவும் இப்போ உடனே கெளம்புறோம் ...இப்ப பஸ் ஏறுனாதான் நைட் போறதுக்கு சரியா இருக்கும் ...சாவிய பக்கத்துக்கு வீட்ல குடுத்துட்டு போறேன் ..போகும்போது எதுக்கும் கேஸ் ,சுவிட்ச் ,டேப்லாம் ஒரு வாட்டி செக் பண்ணிட்டு போங்க ...அத்தையும் மாமாவையும் கேட்டதா சொல்லுங்க ..நானும் போன் பண்றேன் ..போன வக்றேன் சரியா ?"

சரி என்று மனதில் வலியில்லாமல் சொல்ல வெகுவாக பழகி இருந்தான் சுரேந்தர் ..

சூழ்நிலை கைதிகள்-Story made popular through user votes in Tamilish.com

Was off the blog for some time …Mom is recuperating so mind is sort of ok...Followed by my first ever tamil story decided to pen yet another one …lets see how it comes out...


பொழுது சாய்ந்திருந்தது...அர்ச்சனாவிற்கு சுஜா ஞாபகமாகவே இருந்தது...பள்ளி விட்டு கிட்டத்தட்ட அரை மணிநேரம் ஆகி விட்டது....வீட்டில் தனியாக என்ன செய்கிறாளோ என்று
யோசனையாகவே இருந்தது...பணி நேரம் முடிந்ததும் வீட்டிற்கு புறப்பட்டாள் அர்ச்சனா ..

"சுஜா குட்டி என்ன பண்றீங்க "
"வீடியோ கேம் ஆடுறேன் மம்மி "
"ஹோம் வொர்க் பண்ணீங்களா?"
"பண்ணிட்டேன் மம்மி.பசிக்குது.பிஸ்கட் தீந்துடுச்சு "
"அம்மா பேக்ல கேக் இருக்கு ...சாப்பிடுங்க ..அதுக்குள்ள மம்மி டிபன் ரெடி பண்ணிடுறேன் என்ன ?"
"ஓகே மம்மி "
சப்பாத்தி குருமா தயார் செய்து முடிக்கும்போது சுந்தர் வந்தான்...
"அர்ச்சனா சாப்பாடு ரெடியா?" என கூப்பாடு போட்டான் ...
"ரெடி ரெடி" என கூறிய வாறே சப்பாத்தியையும் குருமாவையும் டைனிங் டேபிளில் வைத்தாள்...
"அர்ச்சு பேசாம நம்ம ஒரு ஹுண்டாய் சான்ட்ரோ வாங்கலாமா ?"
"காரா ?இப்போ எதுக்கு ?"
"சுஜாவ டெய்லி ஸ்கூட்டர்ல உக்கார வச்சு ஸ்கூலுக்கு கூட்டிட்டு போறது அவ்ளோ சேப்டியா எனக்கு படல இன்னைக்கு கூட ஒரு டூ வீலர் ஆக்சிடன்ட் பாத்தேன் ... அதும் ஸ்கூல் விட்டு வரும் போது அவ தனியா ரோடு கிராஸ் பண்றதும் பயமா இருக்கு " ...
"சரி கார் வாங்குனா மட்டும் ஸ்கூல் விட்டு அவ தனியாத்தான வரணும் ?"
"காலையில நான் அவள ஸ்கூல்ல கார்ல விட்ருவேன் ;ஸ்கூல் முடிஞ்சதும் என் ஆபீஸ் பியூன்ட்ட சொல்லி அவள கார்ல வீட்டுல ட்ரோப் பண்ணி கார திருப்பி ஆபீஸ்ல விடச்சொல்றேன்...என்ன ஒகே வா ?"
"ஒகே தான் ஆனா ஏற்கனவே வீட்டு லோன் முடியல அதுக்குள்ளே எப்டி இன்னொரு லோன் ......?"
"நான் ஏதாவது கம்பெனில அட்வைசரா சைமல்டேனியஸா வேல பாக்லாம்னு இருக்கேன் "..
"உங்களுக்கு ஏற்க்கனவே பி பி ,சுகர்னு இருக்கு ..இன்னும் எதுக்கு டென்ஷன் ?"
"அதலாம் பாத்தா முடியுமா?"
" நீங்க ஒன்னும் உங்க ஹெல்த் கண்டிஷன இன்னும் வோர்ஸ் பண்ணிக்க வேணாம்;நம்ம நைய்ட்டு சமையல் மட்டும் வெளில ஆர்டர் பண்ணிட்டோம்னா நான் ஏதாவது பிரைவேட்டு ஹாஸ்பிட்டல்ல வேல பாத்தா அரசாங்க
ஆஸ்பத்திரில இப்ப கெடைக்கறத விட மூணு மடங்கு சம்பளம் கெடைக்கும் ...கார் மட்டும் இல்ல ...சுஜா பியூச்சர்க்கு வேண்டியது எல்லாமே இப்போவே பிளான் பண்ணலாம் ..என்ன சொல்றீங்க ?"
"உனக்கு எதுக்கு வீண் டென்ஷன் ?"
"இதுல டென்ஷன் ஒன்னும் இல்ல ,அரசாங்க ஆஸ்பத்திரில எனக்கு அவ்ளோ ஒன்னும் வேலை பளு இல்ல ...அதும் நான் வேல பாக்ர ஆஸ்பத்திரி ரொம்ப சின்னது ... நானும் படிச்ச படிப்புக்கு ஜஸ்டிஸ் பண்றமாதிரி சர்ஜரி ,ஆபரேஷன் அது இதுன்னு நாலேட்ஜ் இம்ப்ரூவ் பண்லாம் "
"அப்போ சரி "
அடுத்த வாரத்திலேயே ஒரு மிகப்பெரிய தனியார் மருத்துவமனையில் மாலை ஐந்து மணியிலிருந்து இரவு எட்டு மணி வரை கைனகாலஜிஸ்டாக சேர்ந்தாள் அர்ச்சனா....
அன்று மாலை ஆறு மணி அளவில் ஒரு பிரசவத்திற்கான ஏற்பாடுகளை செய்து கொண்டிருந்தாள் ...அந்த மருத்துவமனையில் அவள் பார்க்கும் முதல் பிரசவம் அது ...
சீப் டாக்டர் அவளை தன் கேபினுக்கு அழைத்தார்...
" மேடம் ஐ நோ யூ ஆர் பிரிட்டி குட் அட் ஹேண்ட்லிங் டெலிவரி ,ஒன் சுமால் ஆர்டர் ஐ ஹேவ் காட் பார் யூ ப்ரம் அவர் மேனஜ்மென்ட் .வி டோன்ட் என்கரேஜ் நார்மல் டெலிவரி ,வி கோ பார் ஒன்லி சிசேரியன் .கைண்ட்லி பாலோ "
எவ்வளவு பெரிய விஷயத்தை எப்டி இவரால் இப்படி சிரித்து கொண்டே சொல்ல முடிகிறது என்று சிலையாக நின்றிருந்தாள்..
"யூ காட் இட் மேடம் ?"
"எஸ் சார் பட் இஸ் தட் நாட் இன்ஹ்யூமேன் ?"
"யூ ஆர் பெர்பெக்ட்லி ரைட் பட் இஸ் இட் ஒகே இப் யூ ஹவ் எ பிப்டி பெர்சென்ட் கட் இன் யுவர் சேலரி ?"
".................."
அவள் மனது சிற்சில எண்ணங்களை முனகியது ...
"சுஜா காரில் செல்ல வேண்டும் ;அவளையும் ஒரு டாக்டர் ஆக்க வேண்டும் ;அவளுக்கு நகை சேர்க்க வேண்டும் ;பாட்டு கிளாஸ் அனுப்ப வேண்டும் ;கம்ப்யூடர் கிளாஸ் அனுப்ப வேண்டும் ;கிடார் கிளாஸ் அனுப்ப வேண்டும்;அவளை நல்ல ஒரு இடத்தில் மணம் செய்து வைக்க வேண்டும் ;அவள் டாக்டர் ஆனால் அவள் பெயரில் ஒரு மருத்துவமனை தொடங்க வேண்டும் ;அதற்க்கு பணம் வேண்டும் ;பணம் வேண்டுமானால் இந்த மருத்துவமனை நிர்வாகம் சொல்வதை கேட்டுதான் ஆக வேண்டும்..இவ்வளவு சம்பளம் சென்னையில் வேறு எங்கும் கிடைக்காது..."
"மேடம் ஆர் யூ ரெடி பார் தி ஒபெரேஷன் ?"
"எஸ் சார் "..
"குட் .கோ அஹெட் "
"ஆயிரம் சுயநல எண்ணங்கள் மனதினுள் அலமோதிக்கொண்டிருந்தாலும் அந்த ஒன்றுமறியா தாயின் வயிற்றில் தையல் போடும்போது அவள் நெஞ்சயே தைத்தது போலான மரண வலியை உணரத்தான் செய்தாள்...

Craving for gold...

Not that cravings for golden jeweleries ..This is a diff gold.. I read http://meetuttara.blogspot.com/ pretty often…She is a twenty year old gal who is a college junior of my brother at CIT Engg College, Coimbatore.. Her Blog has quite good postings..I read her today’s entry which had this quote...

“Among other things, you'll find that you're not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You're by no means alone on that score; you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You'll learn from them - if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry."

I had a very bewildered mind today in the morning…When I read this it was so soothing… Yeah we are not the only person to be sickened by human behaviors and being so good to people who are actually good to u is no big deal…A small story kinda lesson which I read in my moral science subject at fifth standard gets its place back in my memories.When u do bad to people who do good to u have a character which has value of the metal iron..when u do good to people who are actually good to u then ur character is of the metal silver. When u do good to people who do bad to u then ur character is a golden one…Being gold is not that easy...we actually crave for the golden stuff but we miss somehow being gold. And people won’t let u be gold easily too…what ultimately matters is that living a life which is as beautiful as poetry as mentioned in the quote above …I like the A.R.Rahman ‘s saying ,”I had the option between love and hatred”;I chose love and I am here”. Great one …Me too want my life to be a beautiful poetry; I want that golden stuff on me; I want to choose love;I take steps towards that no matter I fail sometimes but the happiness I get every time I win makes me going ;gives me energy to take the step further towards the goal…May be my last post on this blog would reveal if I have made it..Good luck to me :) and to u too :)

கடிவாள மனசு-Story made popular through user votes in Tamilish.com

Few days back, thought of penning a short story in tamil..so have given my first trial here...pardon me for any spelling mistakes may be if possible the whole story u cud :)Here starts the story ....

edited on 24th Jan :There were lots of spelling mistakes probably coz of not using the gmail transliteration properly...I have corrected the typo mistakes to the extent possible. people who find still mistakes kindly let me know..thanks

"பதினோராம் வகுப்புக்கு போறேன் .சுப்புலாபுரத்து பள்ளிகொடத்லதான் பதினொனாப்பு இருக்கு ...அதுக்கு ஐநூறு ரூவா வேணும்" ....

மிகுந்த பயத்துடனும் பணம் கிடைக்குமா என்ற ஐயத்துடனும் பணம் கிடைக்க வேண்டும் என்ற ஏக்கத்துடனும் தன் தந்தை வேலுச்சாமியிடம் பேசினான் கோவாலு....

"ஐநூறு ரூவா வேணும்னு பொசுக்குனு கேட்டா எப்பிடி கொடுக்க...நான் என்ன பணத்த கக்கத்துல வச்சுக்கிட்டு அலஞ்சுகிட்டா இருக்கேன்", என்றான் வேலுச்சாமி...

அவன் அப்போதைய கவலை தன்னை நம்பி இருக்கும் ஆறு உசிர்களுக்கு மூணு வேளையும் அர வயித்து கஞ்சியாவது ஊத்தணும் என்பதுதான் ....

" எப்பா நான் நானூறு மார்க்கு எடுத்திருக்கேன். வாத்தியார், மேல படிச்சா கண்டிப்பா டாக்டர் ஆயிருவேனாரு அதான்" ....

"அப்ப அந்த வாத்தியார்ட்டயே போயி கேளு ராசா ..வந்துட்டான் ..எனக்கு இருக்ற வெளத்துக்கு கட்ட வெலக்கமாரு பிஞ்சு போகும் பாத்துக்க...நான் இன்னிக்கு என்ன செய்ய ...நாளைக்கு என்ன செய்யன்னு மருவிட்டு இருக்கேன், இவன் டாக்டர் ஆவபோராணம்...நீ டாக்டர் ஆவறதுக்கு முன்னால இங்க ஆறு உசிரு மாஞ்சிரும்" .....

வேலுச்சாமியின் கவலையும் கோபமும் மிக நியாமானது ...சலவை தொழிலாளி அவன். செய்யும் தொழிலுக்கு சோறுதான் கூலி ...பண்ணையார் மட்டும் தான் பணமும் சோறும் குடுப்பார் ...அவரின் வீட்டிலும் இப்பொழுது துணி துவைக்கும் மிசின் வந்து விட்டதால் எப்போதாவதுதான் பண்ணையார் வீட்டு துணிகளை துவைப்பான்...இந்நிலையில் அவனால் எங்கனம் ஐநூறு ரூவா கொடுக்க இயலும் ..ஏதோ இலவச கல்வி, சீருடை என்பதால் பத்தாம் வகுப்பு வரை கோவாலை படிக்க அனுமத்திதான்..அதுவே அவனுக்கு சம்மதம் இல்லை ...படிப்பதை விட தொழிலை கற்றுக்கொண்டால் அவனுக்கு பின் குடும்பத்தை பார்த்துகொள்ளலாம் என்று வெகு நாட்களாக தன் மனைவி சொர்ணதிடம் சொல்வான்..அவள் தான் படிக்கட்டும் என்று கோவாலை பத்தாம் வகுப்பு வரை தேற்றினாள்...

கோவாலும் புரிந்து கொண்டான்...புத்தக மூட்டைக்கு பதிலாக துணிமூட்டை சுமக்க ஆயத்தமானான்...


இந்நிலையில் வேலுச்சாமிக்கு பண்ணையார் வீட்டிலிருந்து அழைப்பு ..
தலை தெறிக்க பண்ணையார் வீட்டை அடைந்தான் ...

நரசூஸ் காப்பி மனம் மூக்கை துளைத்தது...சாம்பார் வாடை வேலுச்சாமிக்கு குதூகலத்தை அளித்தது ..."முத்துமாரி புள்ள சாம்பார் னா உசிர விடும் ...இன்னைக்கு அக்கா சோறு குடுத்தா வீட்டுக்கு கொண்டுபோவனும் "...முத்துமாரி அவனது கடைசி குழந்தை..அவள் மீது ஒரு தனி அன்பு அவனுக்கு...

பண்ணையார் மனைவி வந்தாள்...துவைத்து தேய்த்த புத்தம் புது சேலையையே அணிவாள் ...நகைகளை அவ்வபோது காலத்திர்கேற்ப புதுசு புதுசாக மாற்றுவாள் ...புறத்தில் மிடுக்கானவள்..அகத்தில் கருணை உள்ளம் கொண்டவள் ...

"என்ன வேலுச்சாமி நல்லா இருக்கியா ?இந்த பக்கமே காணும் ?வெளிநாடு கிளிநாடு போயட்டியோனு எண்ணுனேன்"...

"போக்கா நீ வேற ...வெளிநாடு போராப்லாதான் இருக்கு ஏன் பொழப்பு" ....

"இப்பிடி அலுத்துக்குற... ஒனக்கென்ன வீடு வீடா போய் துணி வாங்கி சலவ செஞ்சா வித விதமா சோறு ...ஒரு நாளைக்கு பத்து விதமான சோறு திம்பியா ?"

"ஆமாக்கா ..நம்ம ஊரு மவராசிக பத்து விதமா சமைசுட்டா அம்புட்டுதான் வானம் தரைக்கு வந்திரும் ...சும்மா இருக்கா நீ வேற ... பழைய கஞ்சி நெதம் கெடைச்சா கருப்பசாமி புண்ணியம்" ....

"சரி டா இன்னைக்கு எம் மகன் துணி ஒரு இருவது உருப்பிடி தாரேன் தொவச்சு குடு ..உனக்கு பத்து வக இல்லனாலும் ரெண்டு வகையாச்சும் தாரேன்" ...

"சரி அது இருக்கட்டும் என்ன திடீர்னு இருபது உருப்படி அது ஒம் மகனோட" ...

"அதா அவன் என்னமோ பத்தாப்பு பரிச்சியில முந்நூத்தம்பது மார்க்கு வாங்கிட்டானாம் ..ஆகாசத்துக்கும் பூமிக்கும் குதிக்குறான்... மெட்ராசுல இருக்குற பள்ளிகொடத்ல படிச்சாதான் டாக்டர் ஆவ முடியுமாம்ல ...அதான் பட்டணத்துல இருக்க என் தங்கச்சி வீட்டுல தங்கி படிக்க போறான்..திங்க கெழம பொறப்படுதான்...சரி இருக்குற சட்ட துணி மணிய தொவச்சா தாவலைன்னு ஒன்ன கூட்டியாரச் சொன்னேன் "...

"அப்புடியா படிக்கட்டும் படிக்கட்டும் ". என்று சொல்லி விட்டு துணி மணிக்காகவும் சாம்பார் ரச சோத்துகாகவும் திண்ணையில் காத்துகிடந்தான்...

பண்ணையார் மனைவி வந்தாள் சோற்றோடும் துணியோடும் ...

"யக்கா சாம்பாரையும் ரசத்தையும் தனியாத்தான வச்சுருக்க " ...

"ஆமாண்டா"..

வீடு சென்ற உடன் சோற்றை முத்து மாரிக்கு குடுத்தான்...அது மாரியம்மா, செண்பகம் ,கணேசன் பொன்னம்மா, கோவாலு ,அவள் அம்மா என அனைவரையும் அழைத்து சோற்றை பகிர்ந்தது...

சொர்ணம் ,வேலுச்சாமி கொண்டாந்த துணிகளை எண்ணியவாறே அவனிடம் கேட்டாள் ,"என்ன இருவது உருப்படி இருக்கு".

"பண்ணையார் மவன் பட்டணத்துல போய் பதினொன்னாப்பு படிச்சு பெறவு டாக்டராக போறானாம்", என்று பெருமையுடன் சொன்னான் வெள்ளந்தியான வேலுச்சாமி...

A brisk Meander…

Yes a brisk Meandering could be made possible...Let's see how it cud be done.Before that I wanna write how I make(pass?) my day .A typical Week day means to me as follows…

7.30 A.M: Preparing tea
7.45 A.M: Preparing break fast
8.45 A.M: Selva starts to office
8.45-11 A.M: Browsing net, blogging, staring at g mail; sometimes smile at it when my friends come online and call amma appa.
11. A.M-12.15 P.M: Preparing Lunch.
12.15 P.M: Selva comes home for lunch.
1. P.M -3.P.M: Do some justice to my research .At times I do injustice to it by blogging.
3. P.M- 5.30 P.M: Watch some Tamil movie online or do some house hold works till Selva come home.

The whole schedule seems to be unfair enough keeping me physically very idle. Those haunting days of gym before marriage which helped me reduce 10 kgs came to my mind and made me so worried. So I tried allocating time for doing some exercise in my 3 -5.30 PM slot .It worked some time but most of the time it din happen and a lazy goose like me making it done is such a daunting task!!! So yesterday I made up mind to go for a walk at least till open market (which is a twenty mins walk from our home) from Monday through Friday .I fitted this task in between 10.A.M to 11.P.M slot .After all staring at g mail does not pay much. It was so mind refreshing to go for a walk. I was cursing myself for holding on inside home for nearly four months which only resulted in putting on weight. Every time I walk on the pedaling machine at home, I keep looking at the time in my mobile phone, wanting badly to get down soon and mess up the work out. But I felt totally different when I walked down on the roads. It was drizzling then .The usual fret-fume-on-weather attitude of mine has changed to enjoy-on-weather. Thanks to the brisk meander for inducing the change in me. Hope I continue it daily!!!

Mundhinam...

Again trying to do justice for Selva's Audacity software.After having written the post," Isai" quiet few months back, I have acquired ample amount of guts to publish here my yet another trial.Thanks hariharasudhan ,Vinodh Kumar and of course Selva.But what Vinodhkumar told me was to try singing fast beat songs like alai alai from boys .But sorry vinodh kumar I should have tried ur choice first but i tried this ooaayiye from ayan and ended up in a fear that fast beat songs need good breath control... This bathroom singer lacks it so thought probably after getting proper training in music will give a try for fast beat songs..But allocating time for music training is still an unsolvable mathematical problem.Lets see how it goes...

Anyways i have tried this mundhinam paarthaane song from vaaranam aayiram...Still me and selva are not able to find a way to merge vocal and BGM .We did try some karoke techniques but cud not come out with optimistic results...And the new mike Selva got me don seem to work.So this time too managed with lap top's mike and audacity software.And here is the bath room singer's effort...

Bliss- 80%; Ferocity-20%

The Bliss ferocity percentage split mentioned in the title is what I had while watching the movie Aayiraththil Oruvan (AO). The brighter part in the title is totally because of the AO Team and the darker side is because of the Audience the AO had on that day.Lemme talk about the brighter part first. I was so proud that such a movie has come out from Tamil Cinema Industry .To put it in two words I wud call it, “Brave attempt”. I usually like Tamil movies for its comedy .My favorite hero is always vadivelu.Let him be a comedian, for me he is a hero.Yeah of course some insightful Tamil films exists. But I don’t know I liked AO so much. May be u may not like some parts but the script is so new and hope it sets a new trend. As u all know the script is based on the Cholas and pandiyas. The director has mixed his imagination so well and made it so meaningful. The seven traps set by chola king, of which the movie talks about is so amazing and makes us think how intelligent they were in those days and leaves us with a doubt cud we do it today even with the massive technology we have?…Brahdeeshwar temple built by Raja Raja Cholan still remains as a challenge for the civil engineers and architects across the globe. Needless to say lot many temples in India wud get appended in the challenging list. Not only temples, the literature, paintings, Music, Dance, the medicines etc etc that have roots from our country are fantabulous; their usage and proud needs to be passed on to the upcoming generations. But I see two unimportant elements which have the roots of our country getting passed on sincerely for many generations which is nothing but the rotten stuffs caste and religion. So coming back to AO, the efforts it has taken to pass on our history makes me feel so glad. Every time I wanted to see a Tamil movie here in UK just to hear the Tamil Language on the screen. But this time I was so moved .Hats off to AO team.Jai Ho AO!!!

Now comes the fury part. There was a group of audience in AO who were constantly giggling at scenes which portrayed the wildness of the Chozha,their practices, Reema Sen’s ancient Tamil etc. I am not ferocious on the audience who did not like the movie. Taste differs. No issues on that. But I was upset with the guys who were constantly mocking at the film for no reason. I don’t get one thing. What’s so funny when u see the reflection of your own culture on the screen. Me and Selva were quiet disappointed with those guys. We both were discussing what made them to spoil the show. We thought probably if the same film was directed by James Cameroon or Steven Spielberg they would have applauded the movie and say,” wow what a movie!”Producing a film in Indian Rupees is totally different from producing a film in Dollars and Pounds. In that perspective, AO is an extravaganza for Indian Rupees. What I feel is, some of us get confused what we like. May be we are clueless who we are? Except the ID card our working company gives us what exactly do we have to identify ourselves? We feel so ashamed to talk in Tamil in TamilNadu. Okays in that case do we speak at least good English? No. The level of our English knowledge is something similar to this sentence. “Don’t stand in the veyil.Stand in the puliya marathu nizhal”(courtesy: Dum Dum Dum Tamil Film).So we know neither Tamil nor English. The ultimate quintessential sense that differentiates humans and the rest living creatures is been messed up. At least are we British when in Britain? No. We get the ugly stare from British for talking aloud in the cinema hall. Its cent percent fine if we don’t like the Indian culture. But are we at least following the British Culture which has some good things inculcated in it?British always stand in a queue and get the cinema tickets. We break the queue by making our friend to buy the ticket who stands in the front of the queue. British normally don’t look down people based on their profession (As far as I have observed!). We don’t even stand near people who clean toilets. So who are we? Do we have any identity other than the identity card that’s hanging around our neck?

P.S:The second para of the post aims at pitying the people who are similar to those guys who were giggling at AO show and not all Indians.

Pongal Resolutions

Wish u all a very happy Pongal.The title may sound bizarre but when people could take resolutions on New Year why not on Tamil New year. Changing histories politically does help sometimes. I have not believed in resolutions but just thought why not get into that and try the trial and error method. These resolutions are targeted at keeping my arteries clean and happy amidst the ill effects of my neurons (sometimes).Reasoning is gaining importance in all fields nowadays so have given reasons for the resolutions too.Below is the list.

Resolution 1:Not worrying about situations that could occur in the future.
Reason: Such situations might not occur at all and if at all it happens there should be a better way handling it or if it’s out of my hand I am not gonna handle it anyways so no worries.

Resolution 2: Keeping my neurons fresh with fragrance instead of making it look like a mess dumped with unwanted memories.
Reason: Sometimes having a poor memory does help and memory back up at times results in induction of concentrated unhealthy substances into neurons.

Resolution 3: Being happy with the good happenings.
Reason: we can only feel the present so why wait to be happy for situations that could or could not occur in future.

Resolution 4: Having a selective thick skin
Reason: Being callous towards certain situations may lead to a lifelong happiness as we cannot expect the whole world to be good to us always as it was quiet good sometimes to us in the past and has helped fulfilling resolution 3.

Resolution 5: Avoiding agonies resulting due to the mind disturbing weapon known as, “possessiveness”.
Reason: Having right amount of love towards anything in arteries is indispensable as the excessive amount gets converted into the disastrous weapon possessiveness.

Resolution 6: Setting good self standards, meeting it and monitoring it.
Reason: Self appraisal is the best appraisal and it’s of no use boiling the arteries and threshing neurons with guilt feelings no matter the whole world is praising.

Resolution 7: Remembering all the above six resolutions always.
Reason: Live life to the fullest.

Resolution 8: If all the resolutions do not get fulfilled in the upcoming year, stop taking resolutions.
Reason: Its waste of time typing this post!!!

பாட்டியும் பாடமும் ...

Here is one more post with title in Tamil and post in English.What to do?Tamil titles express more sometimes.Coming to the post part,after having mentioned about my paati (grandma) in my previous Tamil post,my neurons took a detour to the good old days with paati.Growing up with paatis helps u exploring many psychological factors.Paatis have enormous amount of love towards their grand children and children.Sometimes,the insecure feelings they possess,which is a quiet normal thing to own at old age,may lead to certain lil arguments,misinterpretations,frets,fumes etc.Whatever it is,when we look back the days spent with them, u see the colorful part shining bright and the silly part fading away.

Once I was asked to prepare a write up on whom I inspire in life. This write up was part of MBA admission at Great Lakes Institute of Management,where i could not get the admit;that's a diff story but the point is that,I wrote about my mom but now I feel I should have written about my paati who was all the reason behind me writing about my mom. After all coming up in life is fine but being a reason behind it is great!My thaatha(grand pa)passed away when my mom was two years old and my periyama was four years old. All she had was a little agricultural land then and probably a lot more confidence which made her daughters attain a considerable altitude in their lives. Not to mention we are enjoying the fruit of her sweat now.

With that tiny intro of my patti, I am writing one of my experience I had with her which made me go agape. I was a school kid then and I needed a dictionary so I was in search of the same. Here is the conversation me and my paati had.

Paati:enna thedutha?
Me:oru pusthagam theduren.
Patti: enna pusthagatha thedutha.epdi irukkum?
Me:oru periya palaya pusthagam .
Paati:etha pathinathu?
Me : (thinking in mind therinju enna panna pora?)athula English vaarthaikku Tamil la artham potrukkum.(I din tell her explicitly that I am searching for dictionary thinking she may not understand it)
Paati:Ditchunarynu solla vendiyathaane ,iru eduthuttu vaaren.
Me:?????!!!!!

The embarrassment I felt at that moment cannot be explained. But the lesson learnt is helping me out in not looking down on others till now. Later I came to know that, somebody in my village exchanged that dictionary for “kaara sevu” in my paati’s grocery shop and it was paati who gave it to my mom thinking that it might be a valuable one.”Paati ur life has taught me many such lessons ; u r always there in my neurons and arteries ;Love u”.

என் சிறு வயது வீடும், என் ஏக்கங்களும் .

என் வாழ்வின் முதல் பதினைந்து வருடங்களை சுமந்த என் வீடு..
அரசு அலுவலர் குடியிறுப்பிர்க்கே உரித்தான அனைத்து ஏற்ற இறக்கங்களையும் கொண்டிருந்தது...
ஒரு அரை மட்டுமே இருந்தது அவ்வீட்டில் ...
மூர்த்தி சிறியதெனினும் அவ்வீட்டின் கீர்த்தி மிகப் பெரியது ....
நான் ,என் தந்தை ,தாய், இரு தம்பிகள் ,பாட்டி ,பெரியம்மாவின் மகள் என ஏழு உருப்படிகள் ...
இது போக அவ்வபோது என் கிராமத்திலிருந்து வேலை தேடி வரும் விருந்தினர்களின் வருகை ...
எங்கள் கதை இப்படி இருக்க ,என் அண்டை வீட்டில் பத்து நபர்கள்!
சிற்ச்சில மன சலசலப்புகள் இருப்பினும் வாழ்கை சுவாரஸ்யமாய் இருந்தது ...
பகிர்ந்து கொள்வதில் சிரமம் இருந்த போதிலும் ஒரு வகை ஆனந்தம் இருந்தது...
இன்று என் வீடு பல அறைகளை கொண்டு ஓரளவிற்கு வசதிகள் உடைய இரண்டு மாடி கட்டிடமாக இருக்கிறது ...
தாய் தந்தை ஒரு சகோதரன் தவிர மற்றவர் யாவரும் உலகின் பல்வேறு மூலைகளில் உள்ளோம் ...
பாட்டியைத் தவிர ...
பல அறைகளை பொருட்கள் மட்டுமே நிரப்பிக் கொண்டிருக்கின்றன ...
விருந்தினர்கள் வருகையின் நேர அளவு நாட்களிலுருந்து சில மணிநேரங்களாக குறைந்துள்ளது ...
எல்லாம் இருந்தும் ஏதோ ஒன்றை மனம் இழந்திருக்கிறது...
ஒரு வேளை வாழ்கை முறை மாற்றத்தின் பக்க விளைவாக இருக்கக்கூடுமோ?
வழக்கம்போல் என்னால் விடையை கணிக்க இயலவில்லை...

Boon or Bane?

First post in the brand new year 2010.Wish u all a very happy new year. May this year bring health, wealth, victory and happiness in ur lives… After having written a Tamil poem in my blog, now I Know how many people around the globe are there to support Tamil Language. Thanks to all those souls ,who had heart to spend some time on my blog. My site meter does not show the exact details of the visitor but still I could see the visitor’s location and I am so happy about it. I feel all Indian Languages are so beautiful in their morphology and have strong literature support. Probably the immediate previous statement is because of the ignorance I have towards Non-Indian Languages. So each and every language has their own beauty. As usual this post has proved how good I am in righting the post pertinent to the title.

So the actual post continues. I am not so interested in reading novels but I tried cultivating the habit when I was doing my UG thinking that it might help in increasing my verbal GRE score. But fortunately/un fortunately both din happen. Last week I gave a try to make the same old futile thing fertile. Again I could not do anything in making it good. But it did help me coming out with this post. We get education and attain the common sense. The common sense may be sensitive towards science, arts, Moral values etc to an extent. But after attaining the so called common sense in whatever proportions it exists in one’s neurons what happens? I know there seems to be a broken link between the novel reading habit and the common sense sentences. Okays bridging the gap here in the next sentence. What happens really when we read more books after we attain the common sense? Because along with the common sense we might have got the content “creativity”.U may call it as originality too. So what happens to that ?Does it become more concentrated in ur neurons or it gets diluted when u read more books? I just got this doubt coz when I ever I read something and write after that I tend to use the words I read and may be sometimes try emulating the ideas from what I read and ultimately the content ,”creativity” gets diluted in my neurons. I feel knowledge is contagious so I have this reading phobia now. Do we get actually inspired by other’s writing or we just emulate the writings by try making a CCP (cut copy paste) technology probably in a very different new format? U may feel that I am blabbering. But if u feel this post to be sensible ur views are welcome, no matter u oppose or support mine.

விளைவறிந்தும்...

என் பாட்டன் விவசாயி...
என் தந்தை அரசாங்க அதிகாரி ...
நான் கணினி பொறியாளர் ...
என் பிள்ளை அமெரிக்காவில் படிக்க ஆசை ...
ஆக என் குடும்பம் நெல் அறுவடையை எப்போதோ நிறுத்தி விட்டது ...
நெல் மூட்டைகளின் எண்ணிக்கையை வெகுவாக குறைத்து விட்டோம்...
என் கிராமத்தின் பல வீடுகளில் இந்நிலையே ...
இப்பொழுது என் கவலை யாதெனில் ...
என் பிள்ளை அவன் பிள்ளைக்கு சோற்றை ஊட்டுவானா ?
இல்லை ஏதேனும் ஒரு அருங்காட்சியகத்தில்," இது தான் நெல்" என காட்டுவானா?
விளைவறிந்தும் வழியறியாமல் தவிக்கிறேன்...

குறிப்பு : உரையாடல் கவிதை போட்டிக்காக என்னால் இயன்ற ஒரு சிறு முயற்ச்சி...

போட்டியில் பங்கேற்க்க விரும்புவோருக்கான விவரங்கள் மற்றும் போட்டியில் பங்கேற்கும் அன்பர்களின் கவிதைகள்...

புது வெள்ளை மழை ...

Though the title is in Tamil, decided to write the post in English. The word, “for the first time “has been dominating my blog in recent times...This post is no exception...Obviously crossing many first times is part and parcel of one’s life…Same here.

Yeah as the title says, the post is about our first snow experience. The Christmas-Santa-Snow combination is always a perplexing thing for me since childhood, for I have never seen a Christmas with snow...This time the butter got clarified into ghee. Yeah I learnt this term, “clarified butter”, here in UK, as they call ghee as clarified butter. The butter I‘ve mentioned here denotes the literal Tamil meaning that points me and my neurons.Atlast I had the opportunity to see and feel the snow in my life.

It was one fine morning when Selva gave me a call from his office to inform me of the snow. That call turned out to be a missed call and a missed snow...That happens with me most of the time. But some time later the same day I was lucky enough to attend the call and I did see my first snow. That was really a visual treat; Feeling the freezing cold is terrible though.

The first snow din last long. It was snowy and flaky cloud burst the same night and it did prolong for more hours. The next morning the city looked so creamy everywhere… I mean the vanilla ice-cream. The trees had the icing on top of them so did the cars on the roads. The flakes decorated our balcony too. We touched it which reminded me of some sweet.

Children made snow man in the streets. I was reluctant to walk on the streets as it was so freezing and I was lil panic if I will happen to be a snow woman on streets petrified by the snow. I am a finicky creature even towards Chennai’s rainy season and Maargazhi Matham(Winter).Needless to mention how fuzzy I wud be to expose myself to such -7 degrees Celsius temperature. But had to put up with my fuzziness due to week-end shopping and till we reach back home Selva had to put up with my jabbers reg my incapability towards the freezing ambience.




The thick vanilla consistency snow transcends to a transparent flakes a day later if they fail to top up with some more snow fall. Transparent flakes will help us take a break. After all a slip needs a break :) I wish Chennai has snow fall instead of a heavy rain fall. Flakes are manageable than the heavy flood. Our Madippakkam gets a shape of an island every year. May be if its snow I wud yearn for rain. That’s human nature.Okay may be blaming the entire race wud be insane;so rewriting the sentence as That's my nature.

In sum, though my neurons were fretting and fuming regarding my first snow experience, my arteries felt the ecstasy.

Chennai to UK-Part II...

Continuing the post about our UK Experience. Thinking of typing this post in the format similar to our 16 Marks essay type answer with sub headings. Let’s see how it goes… Before starting the subheadings, I would like to give some info about our city Milton Keyenes.It’s a beautiful, less populated and a small city in Buckinghamshire County/State. (Mostly the state names in UK (may be all states I dunno) ends with the word shire!)The city is only 42 years old. So it’s a well planned one. The main recreation centers here are MK Center and the Xscape (which takes 10 mins to reach on foot from our apartment…) and Willen Lake...MK Center is solely a shopping mall and Xscape has skiing, theaters and shops as well. Our week end spot is mostly Xscape and our destination there is always theater and sometimes KFC.The other popular place is the, “Open Market” which is a mélange of petty shops and kai yendhi bhavans…Its opposite to Xscape and near MK center. Why I call it as mélange is that, the shop owners are from different parts of the globe..I mean to say, u will get any kind of grocery, food there .be it Indian, Chinese ,Sri Lankan ,Polish etc…Our favorite places in Open Market are an Indian Grocery shop and Idly shop. Mostly we have our breakfast on Saturdays in that idly shop.

The People:

The kind of patience people here show esp while driving, is unbelievable and commendable. Probably because of the strict laws...But still, abiding the laws and making it executable is praiseworthy. The next thing is the way they handle people .Smile defeats anger always … The other side of the coin…May be for me, it’s the other side and not for British…I mean the core culture, I am not much comfortable with that. Obviously Opinion Differs…

Our Oxford Trip:

Selva planned a trip to Oxfrod.He got a rental car. Believe me he is good at driving despite the fact he (we?) met with few accidents while driving his two wheeler at Chennai. It’s about an one and half hours journey. Throughout the journey I was instructing him to take the proper right and left turns. And I was instructed by the GPS navigation system named TOM TOM.I have never seen it before. Heard of it though. ..The whole day my hero was that lil TOM TOM...It is incredible…Me and Selva once went to a Canon show room in Nungambakkam… That was our first time to reach Nungambakkam from T Nagar. We would have seeked the help of at least twenty people to locate the show room. But this TOM TOM helped us reaching our destination without the help of even a single soul.I should pen here about the way the cities are connected in UK. Each and every city is connected to the rest of the cities through round abouts.The round about will have four entries/exits which connects the cities. This format is seen even in roads connecting streets within the city. Inspite of researching the tourist locations from the Google maps the previous day, we managed to see only one place at Oxford. It’s none other than the Oxford Church.

Birmingham Trip:

Selva’s friends suggested us to visit Lord Venkateshwara Temple at Birmingham. Again with the help of the tiny hero TOM TOM, we reached Birmingham, which takes about one and half hours from MK.The temple looked so good. For the first time in life, I was able to see Lord Venky for about 30 mins continuously minus the crowd standing in a long queue. (When I was doing my fifth standard, I remember standing for about 12 hours just to visit Lord Venky for only One minute at Tirupathi!!!)After having Channa Batura in a shop inside the temple run by North Indians, we left the temple and visited the Sea World. That was really amazing. For the first time I saw umpteen varieties of fishes. They were brought from different part of the world. The funny part was a 4D film about the Sea Lives.They had made it so live by vibrating the chair and splashing water when a huge fish appears on the screen. Cool….

London Trip:

Our next destination was London…This time we planned it so carefully so that we can see more places. I have a childhood friend Vinodh in London. So asked his advice regarding the tourist spots in London.Everytime we plan with the help of google maps, but somehow we don see all the places …It happened this time too even after meticulous prep. Parking space hunting occupies most of the time. It is a real bugging thing. Google Maps sometimes does not have an updated one. The heavy rain added fuel to flames. We had planned to visit Buckingham Palace, Big Ben,a Park near Big Ben,Madamme Tussauds and London Eye. We reached London by 10 am. But till 12 am we were only finding the parking area. London is a busy and populated city so it was very difficult to find one. So we had to change our plans and decided to visit only Madamme Tussauds and if Possible London Eye.We did manage to visit both somehow. It was a Long queue in which we had to stand for about one hour to buy tickets.I forgot to mention two things that made our trip different this time. First thing, Selva’s friend Rageeth accompanied us and the next thing is that we took Canon 500D Digital SLR camera with us. We had bought that the previous day. That was Selva’s dream. We have a digi Cam but we din bring it here as athai and mama may need it and Selva wanted to buy this digital SLR here in UK so we managed the previous trips with our Mobiles to take snaps. This time photos came out very well.Madamme Tussauds, as we all know has statues of Celebrities made of Wax. We took photographs with Gandhiji,Ash,Big B,Salman.Tendulkar and the list goes on….After the visit I felt, its quiet worth standing in the queue for one hour…From there we took a taxi to London Eye as we din want to take our car and struggle with the parking space hunting..London Eye is a kind of big giant wheel but the difference is that the capsules are closed and it is really big. The purpose of this spot is to have a look at the London City. So we saw the Big Ben too from the London Eye. Big Ben is a Historical tower with a clock. Thank god we had a good camera to take snaps from great altitudes. That finished our London Trip.

This essay type answer ends here. As winter has started we don’t know how far we can arrange for trips for the next few months but anyways Xscape is always there..So no worries…Thanks for ur time as i know its a very lengthy post..

Chennai to UK-Part I...

Finally decided to write about our UK experience and I have changed my blog name too...”Diligence” fitted me few years back. Now I feel I am no more a hard worker...I have turned out to be a lazy goose so why create a false impression to the external world? That’s y….I have decided to write the UK experience in parts as I want to give a separate space for my feelings and thoughts that persisted before we left India and during the flight journey. This post is about the same.

Our UK trip was not a much planned one. Selva is very possessive about athai and mama so he had been postponing his onsite opportunity for long time. Somehow he decided to accept for one year UK onsite opportunity. I first decided to quit my PhD, coz I was not sure if I can take a break and I was so scared even to inform my PhD guide Prof Dr.Ranjani Parthasarathi.Atlast on the day when i got relieved from my JRF duties at Anna University, Mam was kind enough to accept for a break...That was a real happy shock for me as I din expect it all…I was very worried to quit my studies to which I had spent more than a year by attending classes, writing exams ,balancing work, struggling to get parents’ permission to marry Selva,etc. But on the other side, already Selva lost many good opportunities he got in B lore as I was studying in Chennai and onsite opportunity is very important to his career.So made up my mind to quit PhD and thought may be after returning back to India I can do PhD in VIT, Vellore.But I know nothing can be a substitute for a PhD in Anna Univ that too under the guidance of Ranjani Mam and I am not a brilliant student to get into IITs for my PhD. Thanks to Mam.

I resigned my job some four days before we left to UK.Selva and myself were so busy .Too much of shopping, shifting house, visiting relatives. We felt so exhaustive. We bought web cameras for our parents and told them about Skype so that we can meet online on skype after we leave to UK. Visa delays made things worse. The ticket booking agency was almost booking and cancelling tickets for us daily. But things started getting ok soon. Our journey got confirmed on Aug ,21,2009. My parents and athai stayed with us at our Adayar Rent home on 20th night. Athai brought us Selva’s favorite kolukaatai and vangi bath. Mama was bit busy with his work so he could not make it. Till 20th Night 9 PM we visited relatives. We had to call/text our friends and relatives. The messy part was till 10 PM we had so much to do with packing, cleaning the house and surrender the same... Me and Selva got things done at around 12 PM.We got up at around 4 AM and got into the cab by 5 AM and reached the airport by 5.30 AM.

I felt my heart getting so heavier. I don’t flinch it so easily and I was struggling so hard in the efforts of not bursting out with tears. I was not even able to respond properly to mama and chitapa who called me on phone when we were in the Airport.Mom bought us sweets and savories form the krishna sweets at the AirPort. Even until we finished our check in I was so composed .But I failed when my mom was in tears. I cried so badly when we had to leave them .I din stop crying till we reached the lobby area. The lady who checked our passport threw a strange look on me seeing me with tears. After Selva requested me and said,”en maanatha thayavu seithu vaangatha “ I tried stopping my tears. Selva who cried a week back when he left his Vellore home was totally cool on the day of flight. In the lobby area, I was quiet ok and I spoke with my BE friends Srivi,vidya subbu who are in B lore and pavai who is in Chennai.Mariamaal and bala mithra too called me on that day.


Sometime later we queued up to enter the flight. That moment was really inquisitive about how a flight would be. That was my first flight journey and for Selva too. When I was working in Anna University me, Raji, balaji, senthil and bharath use to go home together chit chatting, joking and pulling each others legs. When an aero plane happens to fly over our head that time me and raji use to discuss if we will travel by flight in our life. When I was waiting for the flight, I was thinking about the same discussion. Sometimes things we never expect happens so easily and so early too.. I was literally jumping in the queue. Selva was telling about the inconvenience of economy class on which we had to go. When we entered the flight, I saw the business class first. Thinking that it was the economy class, I scolded Selva (of course without his knowledge!) for having created false opinions. Later I came to know the truth. It was Fly Emirates and the reception by the Air hostess was good. But Selva was quiet disappointed with them. He had high expectations to see some colorful good looking smarties.According to me, they were not that bad. Selva always has different opinions. It was a three seater.A French girl was sitting next to me. We had a small conversation. From that I came to know that she is a school student studying in an International School, Chennai and going home for a holiday. I felt so proud of Chennai’s Educational facilities. Actually the flight’s destination is Dubai. From there, we had to catch the connecting flight to London. It’s a good and comfortable three hours journey. We were given dosa, sandwiches, fruit yogurt and juice for our break fast.

When we reached Dubai, I was totally amazed by the majestic appearance of Dubai AirPort. Then after refreshments we waited in lobby for our next flight. We had to travel seven long hours to reach London. A Japanese Girl was next to me and she seemed so tired and busy sleeping throughout .As it was my first flight I din wanna sleep. I wanted to observe things around me. Selva watched some English movie. I had only two options.Dasaavathaaram and Saroja.I opted saroja as I like comedy movies. I felt so uncomfortable to keep my legs in a fixed position. I have travelled by Bus and Train for long hours. Our native place, a small village called Keezhavayali, near Sankaran Koil Town, Tirunelveli District takes fourteen hours from Chennai by bus .I have travelled for about twenty seven hours in train, when I use to visit places in North India regarding my JRF job in Anna University. I have not felt so inconvenient when I traveled by bus or train as I did in flight. Bus will have a kind of semi sleeper facility and train needless to say. But flight was terrible. Selva was after all right about the economy class.


Here I got to talk about the food.We had opted for vegetarian food but as there were some confusion with that, we had to choose Non-Veg. I was given the option of Chicken and fish for the main course. I chose fish.OMG they gave real fish which din have any masala coating on it. It is not their mistake. I was totally new to it. When we use to eat out in restaurants at Chennai, I don’t even try something different; not even North Indian foods. I stick to Dosa always. If you punish me by forcing to eat dosa for breakfast, lunch and dinner daily, I will not consider it as a punishment, I will take it as an action of love instead. For that kind of a person, when a plain boiled fish with some half cooked rice was given, it was like a hell. Thank god they provided some puddings and sandwiches. We started by early morning but the sun remained shining till we reached London.For the first time i felt the rotation of our planet earth.


Atlast we reached London. London Airport looked so old and I feel Chennai airport is far better than London airport. After few formalities, we collected our luggages and walked to the entrance, where a cab was arranged for us. Our actual destination is Milton Keynes, a city which takes one hour to reach from London. I was so eager to see London from car but I was so drained and decided to recharge myself by having a nice sleep. It was 10 PM when we reached Milton Keynes. We were waiting for Selva’s friends to help us reach our apartment .Amidst that waiting time which was less than two mins, I was almost shivering. It was Autumn when we reached UK.But it was worse than the winter in India..We entered our apartment which was so new and stylish..The brand new experience we had in UK from the very next day will continue in the next post.

Losing...

Before starting the post, I would like to thank the blogger.com for creating a space for people to publish their writings ,doodlings ,dawdlings,thoughts etc, who may not be a well known face, having well known talents but not well known to the world and the best part is its free. I have read many marvelous poems, short stories through blogs which may not find their way to a printed version of a book, but i am sure they must have reached so many hearts .To name a few Kavin mughil ,madhuren etc. The word etc is inculcated with so many good blogs. But my memory is so poor to highlight many of them here. Wish I could write like them but being so poetic needs a brain with good and fresh stuff so...k let's leave the same old story...

Looks like I am blogging frequently. No other go. Got to keep myself occupied in some way or the other..Idle mind is devil's workshop. For the sake of blocking the devil, writing this post. Still postponing to write about UK experience. Selva has planned for a trip to London. Decided to write after visiting London. Just thought of registering my y day film experience here. I always compare myself with that good old Bajaj Scooter. During my childhood days my neighbor uncle use to struggle with his Bajaj scooter as it always had starting trouble. The same phobia/mania whatever u name it, I have it.

My desire is that I want to research about NLP after Lunch daily, as I want to finish most of my research when I am here in UK and I have enormous amount of time. But daily after lunch, I will have literally a battle with my stupid mind, whether to see some film or to do some reading /coding. But if I decide to win that day after the battle (according to me reading/coding is winning) nothing can stop me..but landing the decision is quiet a hard one and most of the time I lose. I have framed schedules to finish of my research with deadlines; I have daily task sheets the similar kind which we use to follow in Anna University. All in vain!!!Coz in reality, I am behind my schedule by a month’s time. In this snail pace, I have managed to finish a module but still I could have done even more and still lot to be done before I go to India.

Y day I lost.But it is worth losing sometimes. I saw valmiki Tamil movie. It was quiet a good one. Nowadays without so called big heroes and heroines good films have started filling the hearts of people. I am not aware how it did in box office but I liked it. But when ever I happen to see any irritating or repeatedly told crap stories I will win that day, of course after losing couple of minutes.

Selva always watches English Movies for its wealth in imagination and makes me to do so . He is so choosy in watching Tamil Movies. So I mostly watch English movies when Selva is at home and Vice Versa. l use to lose a day for a good Tamil movie and recommend Selva to watch it .Tit for Tat!!!Madurai to theni Tamil film was one among them. A bit dragging one but good in many parts. Many times, I lose a day completely by applying trial and error technique of finding a good movie after skipping many movies, as most of the time the technique proves to be a futile one. So nowadays I have decided to read the reviews of the movies in many sites and then go ahead to lose a day. After all a lose should be worth enough to lose right?

Isai

The moment I chose this as the post title ,my favorite actor vadivelu’s dialogue struck my mind….Isai enga irunthu varuthu?aarumonia pottikuula irunthu varuthu…Antha maathiri oru comedyathaan ippo namma paaka porom…..This is the second post I am writing about Music in my blog. The reason I am writing this ,is Selva. He downloaded an audio recorder software called Audacity for me nearly two months ago..but I dint even care about that software. But I was having the guilty twinge in mind so making use of the software thru this post.
Me and selva are diehard fans of Ilayaraja. We always listen to his songs. That too the numbers composed by him during 80’s are always our darlings.We sometime try singing along with the songs.Yaaruvenaalum paadalaam aana yaaru atha kepaangandrathuthaan romba mukyam..But on that point we don have prob at all..We both have highest levels of tolerance for each other..Touch wood.. and I am kind of a singer whose level is bit lower than a mediocre bathroom singer. But Selva always says I sing well… may be comparatively and as I am his wife he had no options..He always wants me to learn music and I am always diffident and lazy too…. And life when we were at Chennai was really hectic .I found very difficult to balance family,studies and job…Now have ample time so selva wants me to do something useful so he downloaded the audacity software two months back.
So today decided to do something with the software.So after using so many so's in the post, I just recorded first few lines of some of our favorite songs and have uploaded the same here. Weak hearts careful.

Call it a pendulum?

Just got settled with the laptop to write about the two words I hate the most. Right now I am a home maker at UK , so have ample time to enjoy almost everything I desired. Cooking, blogging, day dreaming, singing and sometimes researching NLP. Will write about my UK experience some time later as I am yet to visit more places .Other than Milton Keynes (the city we reside) and Oxford, I have no idea about UK .So only imbibing the ambience I dwell right now and waiting to write about the same later. Think I have got into another loop of thought .shall I use break; statement ?hee hee java konjam konjam muje maalum hai(greatest injustice done to my mother tongue and Hindi...forgive me !)This is a big prob with me.I start writing something but end up writing something else .My mind is such a brisk monkey. It never stays at a place so do my writings.OMG! Look at this I have entered into another loop of thought! So breaking all the loops and getting into the matter straight.

Actually the word pendulum in the Title does not matter much. The word ,”it” matters a lot. Yes the pronoun ,”it”.Will come to the It part of it later before that do u know RC circuits? Yeah the circuits involving resistors and capacitors but they don’t have any contributions to this post/article. But just thought of stealing their abbreviations to denote those two killer words. I mean the words Religion and Caste. I literally forgot the effects of RC circuits built with resistors and capacitors studied during my BE but I know the circuits built with religion and caste are so dangerous.

I don’t know when these kind of thoughts got induced into me. I don’t know why I hate the RC circuit may be because of its usage as business tool whose output is always destruction of the society. I would like to quote here Mr.Kamalhasan’s dialogue in vasool Raja MBBS film.”Kadavul illannu solravana nambu;kadavul irukkunu solravanakooda nambu aana naanthaan kadavulnu solravana nambaatha”.Wonderful dialogue.Yeah its true.And I don decipher how people believe blindly those people whose job is only to deceive people in the name of god. What irritates me the most is that, the way the superstitious ideas are seeded into human hearts in the name of god. I don’t mean the rituals that have scientific proof as Albert Einstein says,” Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.” I mean the many stupid stuffs like slaughters done through the rituals be it animals or be it humans, the killing of rationale thoughts out of human brain etc.


What I believe is that,there are no divisions among gods. We accept and have made the technology, medicines, fashion, entertainment and even food as a common thing. I have seen my friends mentioning Thai and Chinese cuisines as their favorite cusines in orkut.But we still say no to a common religion .. I can see all the religions have a common thread running throughout. They all preach the Be good Do good policy.I remember the words from panjali sabatham which says,”tharmaththin vaazhvathanai soothu kavvum;tharmam marupadi vellum”.I strongly believe dharma is the god throughout. I have felt it umpteen times. When I do/think good ,it results in some nice things else the other way round.I don't try to depict myself as a good girl here as i strongly believe that I don't have the rights to do it by myself …I am just writing what I think. Of course nobody can be a perfect individual. Only thing I can do is to maintain the Good: Bad ratio properly.Ada ada ada.!!!.ore thoughtsa kottuthu…mandaikulla kaliman valam jaasthi..athoda effectunga….okies …..Back to business..

I do understand that the religion evolved as a system local to the society where it formed .The sangam literature says gods vary with the landscapes. For instance ,Lord Murugan is the god of the landscape kurunji which is surrounded by mountains and kotravai is the god of landscape paalai which is surrounded by desert .But now the scenario is completely diff.Globalization rules us .The hair style of Hollywood actress and the hair style of my friend in Tamil Nadu are identical. So where lies the prob?I feel Man took religion in his hands to maintain discipline amidst society but he never knew that time that the religion will take him in its hands and destroy him or at least his rational thoughts. What a Pity?

And regarding the second component of RC circuit, I don’t see any difference between the first and the second component. I perceive it as only the descendent or the subdivision of the first component. I was twelve year old child then; I was asked to take bath after having touched a lady at our native place .Thats when I came to know the influence of the damn second component in the society. I use to pester my dad with so many questions before my marriage. Now Selva is the victim.I use to ask dad why they give admissions to degree courses based on caste and not based on economic conditions. Still I have the guilty feeling for having got two degrees thru MBC quota.Thats why I din wanna apply for Masters in India and tried for Masters in US. But I din get any admits in US due to my poor marks in GRE. Thank god they din have this quota thing in PhD admissions .I want atleast my child not to have that guilty feeling. Now the “it” thing enters the post at last.

I know talking about the title at the end of the post sounds so stupid. But could not help. I have seen some movies getting ended with the dialogues as their titles. I may write/talk whatever I want .But when it comes to reality do I have the freedom? Yes I do .But do I use it .No.Why? Fear for the elders and society?May be. I pray god at home and perform rituals when asked by parents or in-laws. I go to temple. I wear the mugamoodi always(if u have read my post titled mugamoodi u wud understand what I mean).The feeling which I cannot describe or christen it so left it as a question mark in the title..yes the title it.I am not able to call myself as a theist or an atheist. Not able to fix me in one position that’s why my dear it is like a pendulum. I like Mrs.Suhasini’s dialogue in the film vaseegara.Here it goes.”Manushanthan mothalla porathaan.sambrathaayam illa”.

Now here in UK I don’t perform rituals but have a krishnar idol which I see as a portrayal of dharma not as a god of Hindu religion.Atleast I am quite comfortable with the point that I am an atheist who believes dharma as god ,the super power that rules the humanity.Dharamam eppothum vellum.(Truth always triumps).

P.S:The article/post is all about my views only.I don't mean to hurt anyone or their views which may be controversial to mine.

Thank You Friends!

Almost a year since I wrote something on my blog.I don’t know why this huge gap happened.Just logged in to write a new post in Tamil. But I was shocked seeing my blog visitor counter.It showed some numbers beyond 11,000.eleveeeeeeeen thouuuuuuuusaaaand!.I just widened my eyes to see if it is really true.Started counting the way we use to do in our primary classes like in terms of tens,hundreds and thousand.Yes in all the ways it is showing the same huge number.I started writing my blog in the year 2005.I remember at the end of the year 2006 it was around 1000.At that time few of my friends rarely read my blog and only me and selva use to view my blog daily.As days went on I rarely posted on my blog and even me and selva rarely viewed it. At this situ I am not able to decipher how my counter shows such a huge number. My blog does not have so very useful info except my babblings… that’s y I was a gaped to see it.Anyways it must be the contribution of my friends .I thank all those souls for having spent their valuable time on my blog!.I request those souls to leave a comment on my posts with their name if it is good or bad which could help me come up with more useful things. Thanks once again!

முகமூடி

காலை வேளையில் என் முகமூடி ஒன்றனக்கு திலகம் இட்டேன் ...
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இவ்வுலகை விட்டு என் உடல் அழியும் வேளையில் எஞ்சி நிற்ப்பது தன்மானம் ஒன்றேனும் இருக்கட்டுமே....
சமூகம் ஒரு புறம் இருக்க, திருமணத்திற்கு பின்னர் எந்தையிடமும் தாயிடமும் கூட கடுஞ்சொல் கூறா இன்முக முகமூடியையே அணிகிறேன்...
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காதல் திருமணம் செய்ததற்கான தண்டனை ....
எனக்கு நானே கொடுத்துக்கொண்டது...
மற்ற பிற உறவுகள் என்றும் நிலைத்திருக்க வேண்டியிருப்பின் அதற்கான பிரத்யேக முகமூடிகள் தேவைப்படத்தான் செய்கின்றன...என் செய்ய ?
" உன்னவனை மறந்தாயடி " என்றது ஒரு கூக்குரல் ...
கூக்குரலில் உண்மை இருந்தது ...
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இறைவா உமக்கு மீண்டும் நன்றி....