Unspoken Words!

Again, back to my space! Looks like I am frequently visiting these days!  May be writing has taken the first place in refreshing my arteries and neurons. For some reason our Diwali sorry Deepavali (That’s how I am told to use by one of my friends 😊) was celebrated on 26/10/19. So, felt relatively free today morning and I did not feel like studying Machine Learning due to my inconveniences in my health condition. Feel I am not taking proper care of my health and I just need to put it in the first place . Yeah I know I have been meandering without coming even closer to the Title! Recently, happened to watch a short film named, “Kooraa Vaarthaigal” .Found the title so captivating but unfortunately the content was not ! But the title kept hitting my neurons and spitted some thoughts consistently so thought its time to update my blog and I am here.

First I thought, for a chatterbox like me, there could rarely be scenarios where words go unspoken! I was just trying to think in what situations words go unspoken. Hmmm, ok me being a person a who have the inability to verbally hurt people will have much words that are unspoken and keeps hurting us back all the time. Few days back, my friend Dr.Umarani mam from IIITDM invited me and my team to her Institute to give Natural Language Processing ideas to her B.Tech student who wants to explore this domain and Uma mam is an Image processing expert. I was then telling her my inability of aligning my Phd Scholars towards the right path as they always keep research as the last option. Only 2 of my 6 PhD scholars match my wavelength and rest make me feel as a failed Phd Supervisor.  I realised it is just the inability of me to vent my anger on them which could drag them on to the right path. Unspoken words Scenario #1. I have quit anger (like people quit smoking 😊) in the recent years as I find, peace is always the best choice!

Scenario #2 would be my inability to express my thoughts verbally due to my policies! I have been facing few setbacks due to not opening to claim my rights. This has been happening at college. Most of the time, the opportunities are missed just because I hesitate to ask for myself, I know people in this world will rarely watch what we want and they are keen only in what they want from us. Of course, we can’t blame them too when they don’t have a clue of what we need, what we missed out though we deserve, and it is not easy to keep track of everyone in such a big institution. Selva Keeps telling me that I can only get certain things only if I ask but my rigid policies make me tight lipped and many words go unspoken.  I still believe things happened for a reason and if I am doing my job with love and passion it will pay me back for sure may be with some delays. Of course, there is a lot of positive things that has been constantly happening to me at SRM and I am happy for that 😊

Due to my absence of mind sometimes, I don’t fill in the words in the right place that are supposed to have spoken. This happens when I am so busy and if somebody calls, I skip those words and later I feel I should have spoken more.  I guess most of my friends would have faced this and I know that they all know about me. I have been lucky to have people who would read my current state of mind from my words .  My M.tech friends and Tamil Computing lab friends face this much. Anitha (my M.Tech friend) and Balaji (my Tamil computing lab friend)  are  the victims most of the time. I  many times send them  sorry messages for not speaking well and They  always understand and this has never stopped them  to call me.   I feel this component is the bond. The ppl  who can understand your unspoken words, are not to be  missed  out 😊 and yes this holds good only for friends and not for those who stick around with conditions 😊 wow I have grown up and can understand people better. Yeah I forgot Selva, my husband  who also happens to me my M.tech friend (LOL) is the greatest victim ever to all my inconsistencies. He is the best  after my mom who can translate my mind when I have lil or no words to speak 😊. Of course, when he being the man of few words and when I am able to understand his unspoken words no wonder he should also understand mine 😊. Scenario #3 is done !

Scenario #4 would be the words which are not expressed fearing which may not fit. This happens with very very few may be one or two people, but you see the geographical distance does play a vital role. But I am taking things positively, Sometimes, a beautiful friendship exists stronger even when there is a long communication gap. Unspoken words do not have a great impact.  I believe when without any communications, if the friendship exists it inherits the best  purity in it . Yes, I value people more, I cant afford to miss good people as they are the treasures and they lead me in the right path no matter they are in touch or not. Their positive vibes do have a great impact on me. Though they are missed much and sometimes feel why even this gap exists when the world is too small😊. Anyways, dwelling in people’s mind is always a good thing !

I think I am done. There are many other scenarios where words go unspoken, These four scenarios  came to my mind this morning. Words are always a beautiful tool. They can make even a worst situation more beautiful and can bring in peace. I believe in expressing thoughts by words, I believe being open , right or wrong and that’s how good people stay for long despite many mismatches but unspoken words are also sometimes beautiful . They can also bring in peace, words skipped in anger, for instance  and they can also create bond when  the minds are in perfect sync 😊  

I hope I did not spoil your Deepavali . Anyways, wishing you a very happy Deepavali. Have fun and Go-ahead 😊 thanks for reading

Subalalitha