Me, my Education and my Parents #4

Of course, for any person, parents will be the people behind their educational journey. My parents have supported me a  lot. Though I am a mediocre student, my parents always chose the best path for me. Morever, I had a very inconsistent academic performance. In 10^th , I scored 462/500. Since, we shifted our home from Foreshore Estate to Madippakkam, my school also got shifted. That affected me mentally. I like my old school (St.Antony’s Girls Higher Secondary School ) very much. It had a very friendly atmosphere, more extra-curricular activities, and best teachers. Though it was a government aided school, we had the best teachers. I will surely write about my school teachers one day in my blog.  The school I joined in 11^th was more like a prison.  It is apt to call it as a tuition centre rather than a school. My parents admitted me there as it is the best school in Madippakam. While my both younger brothers could manage the change perfectly, I was not matured enough to handle the change, I was struggling a lot. My mom took so many efforts to make me perform better. She was a Tamil Professor in Nandanam Arts and Science College then. Her colleagues took coaching classes for my school students.  Though I had  special attention, I was not able to cope up. I did not like the school ambience itself. That got registered in my mind very well.

My parents were very worried about my performance in 12^th board exams. My parents are very actually strict. They tried scolding me, gave advices, even my brothers started getting worried.. Though my mom’s colleagues took coaching for Engineering/Medical entrance examination at my school itself,  my mom chose me to put in ICE coaching center  for my entrance exams, as they understood that I did not like the school. My dad used to accompany me for coaching classes  daily from Madippakam to T Nagar.  Somehow, in 12^th I managed to score 1000/ 1200. Nobody will believe that I scored exactly 1000 but it is true . In entrance, I think  I got 68.5/100. I don’t remember exactly. I had a very low cut-off.  My parents and my brothers were so worried and bit angry. I actually wanted to pursue my career in Engineering. My parents very well knew this and they gave me another chance. I still remember my dad said, “Engineering collegela sethurren aana olunga padikanum”.  After analysing so much they decided to admit in SRM Easwari  Engineering College in Electronics and Instrumentation stream.

From day one, I focussed on my studies in my BE. Yeah, I liked the college, the stream and the people there too. I passed out with First class with distinction. But then I struggled a lot to get a job. I attended so many campus interviews but cud not get through. I had actually planned to pursue MS in US and went for GRE coaching. My parents did not say no to that. Though they knew that financially it is difficult to support me,they said, “ u go ahead, we will manage”. Again I got a low GRE score . I think I scored 390/800 in Verbal ;690/800 in  aptitude and 4/6 in Essay. Friends and many said it is possible to get an admit with this score, as I had a good academic score. I applied for 5 US universities and 1 Singapore university. My parents spent around 50k for this application process and all went in vain. It is a huge amount for my parents. Still I feel guilty whenever I think about that.  I did not get an admit in any Univ.

While I was busy applying for US universities, I totally forgot to apply for PG in Tamilnadu but my mom had bought an application for doing ME and MBA in TN .  I only singed in that  and she filled it and had applied. I was confident about MS but was totally diffident about ME/MBA. Things totally changed.  I scored well in ME/ MBA exams.  I forgot the scores but got a good ranking. I got a call from Anna University for MBA. Meanwhile, I got an admit in SSN Eng College and my dad chose Computer Science Engg Stream. I did my BE in Electronics and Instrumentation.  I was so scared but my dad thought I can manage as many said Comsci is easy. I was so doubtful and I got fever  that evening. I still remember my second younger pasumpon did not even have his lunch till I reached home from counselling after coming to know that I chose Comsci. He knows that I don’t like it.  I actually wanted to do MBA but my parents wanted me to do ME.  After having messing up in MS plans, I thought it is fine to pursue ME abiding my parents.

In ME, again I liked college, people but not the subject. I was totally diffident about getting through in semester exams. As guessed, I flunked in 3 papers out of 5 papers in my first semester. My parents again got worried. With the help of my friends there, I managed to clear my 3 arrears and 6 papers in second sem  in one shot. I am thankful to my friends, they made me like ComSci by teaching  it.  I think I have written about my BE and ME friends in my blog. They are amazing people. Then finally I passed out with first class, searched again for jobs but managed to get only a teaching job in Saveetha Engineering college. That’s when I came to know, teaching is my career and not software engineer. I really loved the job and actually could very well do it. Every time I take class, I feel satisfied and I think I have written about this also in my blog.

Then, I got Junior Research Fellow (JRF) job in Tamil computing Lab, CEG, Anna university. I decided to join here, as I wanted to do PhD to make teaching career, a permanent one. My parents supported my decision to pursue PhD. At last, I am done with my PhD. Sooner or later, will take up teaching  as my career after checking if my kid  Nila is comfortable or not.

It is a fact that all parents would like to educate their daughters. But at the end of a basic degree most parents take a decision of getting their daughters married if they are not so good at their academics. My parents did think differently.  With all the inconsistencies throughout my academics they could have come to a decision of getting me married after giving me a basic education, as done by most of their friends.  They always wanted me to prepare myself to stand on my own legs before marriage. One more fact was that, both my younger brothers were so consistently good in academics. First one got EEE in GCE, Coimbatore and the second one got Mech in CEG, Anna Univ. My parents were  least worried about their academics and they spent much more less for their education compared to me.

I am not a pampered child at home, my parents are so strict but every time I failed, they gave me a second chance; they supported my decisions when required. Not only in academics, they also supported my decisions in my personal life. Every time they supported my choice, they clearly told the limitations of my choice and they always advised me to be strong with my choice.   After marriage, they understood that it is the turn of Selva to take care of me. Selva is a kind of possessive natured person but my parents have always advised me to abide by  Selva’s decisions. I think parents only wish their kids to be happy, at any point in their lives. I can only make my parents feel proud by being strong in my decisions and achieve a good position in my career. That way, I could make the efforts taken by them meaningful.

Thanks for reading.